BIPOLAR 1 FEELS LIKE….

BIPOLAR 1 FEELS LIKE….


(smooth music) – Hey everybody, happy Thursday. Now, today’s question is all
about Bipolar 1 Disorder. What is it and how can it
feel to those who have it? And just as a reminder, I release videos on Mondays and on Thursdays, so make sure you’re subscribed and have your notifications turned on so that you don’t miss out. Now, to get into what
Bipolar 1 Disorder is, first, I wanna read to you what
the diagnostic criteria is. And if you don’t know what I
mean by diagnostic criteria, just know that this is what
mental health professionals, like myself, use to help them determine what mental illness you have. They look into the DSM or other manual, depending on what country you live in, and they check to see
if your symptoms line up with the diagnosis they are considering. With all of that said,
in order to be diagnosed with Bipolar 1 Disorder,
you must meet the criteria for a manic episode. Now, the manic episode
may have a hypomanic, meaning not quite as high-leveled, or a major depressive episode,
meaning swinging way into the low side, feeling
super, super depressed. So, it may have one of those
episodes before or after it. But, you just have to meet the criteria for a manic episode. And in order to do that, you
must have a distinct period of abnormality and persistently elevated, expansive, or irritable moods, and abnormally and persistently increased goal-directed activity or energy. And this has to last for at least one week and present most of the
day, nearly every day. And during this period, you
must also have three or more of the following symptoms. Number one, inflated
self-esteem or grandiosity. Number two, decreased need for sleep. You could feel rested maybe
after only three hours or so. Number three, you are
more talkative than usual or feel internal pressure to keep talking. In my practice, I notice
this when I can’t seem to get a word in with a patient and they just keep talking,
almost without taking a breath. Number four, you can
have a flight of ideas or feel like your thoughts are racing. And this is really when we can feel like we’re having way too many good ideas and we can’t even capture them all. Many of my patients have said that this can feel like all their good ideas are just slipping through their fingers. Number five, distractibility. And this is kind of self-explanatory, but we can be easily pulled into things that aren’t important or
struggle to say on topic. Number six, an increase
in goal-oriented activity. This can be at work, school, socially. We can even be overly
sexual or feel agitated. And in my experience, most of my patients will be focused on one major thing, like this presentation they
wanna put together for work or a party that they’re going to throw, it’s gonna be the best thing ever. Or, they just feel really irritated with anything and everything. And number seven, and the last one, is excessive involvement in activities that have a high potential
for painful consequences. And this is the one that really bothers my patients the most. This is when we go on shopping sprees or just overspend in general. We can have a sexual encounter
that we usually wouldn’t. We can foolishly invest money, and the list can go on and on and on. Pretty much, we do things
that we normally wouldn’t. And once we come down
from this manic episode that we’ve been in, these are the things that can push us down into
that depressive episode because we can feel extreme
guilt, embarrassment, or just upset with the
choices that we made. Now, this manic episode
must impair our ability to function in our life,
socially, at work or school. You know the drill, this comes along with all diagnostic criteria. But, Bipolar 1 cannot be
due to a medical condition or induced by drugs or medication, other than an antidepressant. Because if you aren’t aware,
when we’re misdiagnosed as having depression,
which happens all the time, then we’ll put us on an antidepressant when we really have Bipolar 1 Disorder, and that antidepressant has the ability to push us into a manic episode. Because a lot of antidepressants have this stimulating response and this stimulating
symptom that they give. And so, if we’re feeling really depressed, it can push us straight out of that and all the way into mania. And many of my patients
have had this happen, and that’s why it’s really, really important to track our symptoms, ask any question that we may have, and ensure that we are properly diagnosed. Because remember, you know yourself and your experience best. Now, the final part of this question is, what can Bipolar 1 feel
like to someone who has it? And that’s honestly gonna be really, really hard for me to describe
fully because as you know, everyone is different. So, I encourage any of you
who have Bipolar 1 Disorder to leave in the comments
how it feels to you, what’s your experience? And that way, we can all
learn from one another and be more informed and educated. But, based on my experience in my office, Bipolar 1 Disorder can feel good at times because mania can be a little euphoric. But, this feeling doesn’t
always last very long. But, when my patients
are sort of ramping up into this manic episode, they can really struggle
to see it as a problem and they feel good about how
productive they’re being, or they’re really enjoying
the surge of energy, because usually, this comes
out of a depressive episode, so they’re like, “Ooh, goody.” And I’ve also had patients
and viewers tell me that mania can often be
really, really uncomfortable. Almost like you wanna just
crawl out of your skin. And if we find ourselves
having a mixed episode when we have both mania
and depression happening at the same time, we can feel really
irritable and uncomfortable. And this can also happen
if someone stops us from doing what we want when we’re manic or sort of gets in the way of us engaging in our manic behavior. And I’ve had this happen in sessions when I notice a patient is
manic and I try to intervene. They can get really upset
and be quick to anger. So, know that while mania
can feel good at times, that’s not always the case. Just like any mental illness,
we have to ask questions and seek to understand what it’s like for the person in our life
who has Bipolar Disorder. That way, we can better understand them and their experience.
(mellow music) And finally, I just wanna
talk about the comedown. Often, when people talk
about Bipolar Disorder, they talk about the
mania or the depression, forgetting that there’s
this time in between. And following a manic episode, like I mentioned briefly before, it’s very common for someone
to be filled with shame, embarrassment, and guilt. So, being a little
understanding and compassionate can go a long way during this timeframe. I mean, imagine if you
didn’t feel like yourself, you weren’t able to make
thoughtful decisions, and you felt like you
were on top of the world, only to come down and
realize that you did things you wish you hadn’t. That can be really hard. And until we find the right medication, therapy, and get to know our
own early signs of mania, that’s really, really helpful by the way, well, we can have episodes like
this every few months or so. So, if you think that you
may have Bipolar 1 Disorder, just know that you can live a
very full and wonderful life. You just have to find the treatment that works best for you. And I hope this information was helpful. Please let me know if I left anything out or if you have any other thoughts that you would like to share. Share those down in the comments, and I will see you next time, bye.


100 thoughts on “BIPOLAR 1 FEELS LIKE….

  1. Is it possible to have Bipolar 1 Disorder AND Borderline Personality Disorder? My therapist feels like I have both but possibly high-functioning in both diagnoses.

  2. I have bipolar 1 and can identify with a lot said here but I think the biggest thing I want to mention is the mourning period I am currently experiencing now I’m well medicated.
    I miss my super power (mania) I always knew in my deepest depression that mania would come again and I would feel pure pleasure again so it gave me hope too push through it. Now I live in grey I really miss it and mourn for those perfect days again.

  3. Bipolar 1 here. My mania feels amazing! I hyper focus on work or projects. I am sociable in situations I normally wouldn't be. I am able to help loveed ones like no tomorrow. Then there is a sudden turn…I can't sleep and start getting really paranoid. I hallucinate and my projects stop making sense. I buy things in multiple different forms. For some reason, I end up hating the Catholics. Then I use to end up using drugs to try to bring it back down. Love the build up but hate full blown manic episodes. Seroquel has made one of the biggest differences in my life but the weight gain is terrible. I need constant reminders why I shouldn't go off of it. Symptoms are not perfect, but they are a lot more manageable.

  4. I'm a person who has bipolar 1. For me it was tricky. I grew up not knowing that I was bipolar so I was just constantly riding that roller coaster. Those goal oriented manic episodes just feel like your trying to take control of your life again. Something positive driven by something so shaky and pressured. Some nights when I'm asleep I remember stupid moments from my episodes and wake up and feel that guilt and shame for the rest of the night. I consider my self an empath too , so sometimes I don't even feel those emotions my self. If I see someone else showing anger our symptoms that are manic. I begin to feel manic myself hoping no one notices. This video really helps me organize things about my life . I truly appreciate that you make these videos. I pray everyone that's dealing with this treats themselves kindly and know your not alone

  5. It's really frustrating to be diagnosed with dysthymia and also bipolar swings because I can't go on medication for that exact fear of inducing manic episodes 🙁 It's been a looong battle with my mental state

  6. My psychiatrist diagnosed me with Bipolar disorder but never said which one. Everyone else feels I have ADHD instead. He also claims I'm clinically depressed, but I'm not, I'm situation-ally depressed if things go sour or if it's a bad day. Haven't taken Zoloft (stopped it myself) or anything in years and I feel fine.

    2. I work 10-12 hours a day doing on-call over the internet service work and data entry and I then stay up until 2 am or so so I get my own time in because I hardly get any time. Is this valid for #2?

    3. Comes and goes, if the conversation is interesting, I can talk for a while but I don't motormouth it, not sure if this is the same thing.

    5. Happens a lot, like if I'm doing a project, I get into it, then put it away and move onto another one, and do same, rinse and repeat. Sounds more like ADHD symptom to me but not sure.

    7. This is what got me in trouble 10 years ago and I'm paying for it, I also like to buy stuff on amazon a lot or indulge in a lot of food eating (will be the death of me probably), does this count as part of the diagnosis?

    Thank you for your time Kati :-).

  7. I have Bipolar 1 with both psychosis and mixed episodes so it’s pretty awful. I have only had a few manic episodes that felt good. I was all over the place. I was planning an affair and planned on leaving my house I own and my marriage of 21 years to live with someone I just met. I went out binge drinking and drove drunk, was using pills. Highly sexual. Then I crashed and was lost. I quit my job then went back. I went for years hating myself laying in bed and put on 50 pounds. It’s taken years to forgive myself. I had several more manic episodes in there. It’s taken years and the aftermath has got me on medication. I am on 4. I can’t go back to that insanity

  8. This has nothing to do with the video, but it's the newest one, and I figure you might be most likely to check this comment section. Could you please reach out to Yasmyn Switzer? She's a youtuber going through some pretty hard times right now and I believe that you might be able to help her.
    (I understand that I am meddling and if she already has a therapist or something, sorry for giving a totally useless suggestion, but the way I see it, there's no harm in reaching out and trying to help. Just ignore me if this is the case.)

  9. Please do a video on Bipolar II! And please specify what’s different between hypomania and mania

  10. Would definitely love a video like this on Bipolar II as well! One of my best friend was recently diagnosed with Bipolar II Disorder, along with a few other things. Since I'm not as familiar with Bipolar II, a video would definitely help me understand what she's going through. Thanks!

  11. Can you talk about mania being confused with PTSD? I guess this happens a fair amount, especially with cPTSD, because people don't reveal their trauma to a psychiatrist they only see 4 times a year….. I watched a NAMI video where they talked about how insomnia, anxiety, and irritability can look like bipolar, but is simply a triggering of PTSD. The difference is that mania has less need of sleep where as PTSD will have similar sleep hours, but be exhausted. My P kept trying to put me on bipolar drugs despite my insistence that I was not manic (my mother and sister are bipolar, so I see why she was going that route, but I am unusually familiar with what mania looks like!) I finally relented and spent a week in drug induced psychosis. I had to have my therapist call her and explain what was going on for me (I was undergoing an unusual amount of triggers at the time). After they talked, they both agreed it was not bipolar. I share my story because it shows how your treatment team NEEDS to communicate regularly and that you need to be informed about your condition(s) and meds. It was my bipolar sister that instructed me to call my therapist when I was having problems with the med! So it is not a bad idea to let someone you trust know when you are making med changes.

  12. I've had BP1 for a very long time and there have been only a handful of times where I've been stable long enough to realize my personality separate from my disorder. I have not held a job longer than 7 months because stress can make symptoms unmanageable. I am never sure what amount of happy or sad is appropriate and it can cause me a lot of anguish. I also have experience being constantly under the emotional microscope with people who know of my diagnosis. I've lost friends and family who just couldn't understand that my extreme change in feelings were out of my control and thought that I was being selfish. Life is a constant stream of psych medicine appointments and therapy and because of this, I've been deemed disabled.

    I count myself as being blessed though for having a spouse and support system that have made the decision to get to understand that I am not my disorder, but that I suffer through one.

  13. What is the difference between Borderline Personality Disorder vs Bipolar? I'm having a really hard time sorting it out (my sister has been diagnosed with BPD) just want to know how to spot the differences? I have't talked to her in years for extenuating circumstances of course, but would be interesting to know where the differences are? Thank you Kati!

  14. really happy that you made this video 🙁 i was diagnosed with bipolar 1 disorder just a week ago and im very confused about it …. im trying to understand it better and this helps a lot, its really frustrating to not understand whats going on with ur own brain ://

  15. Hi Kati, I have a question (its two parts) to ask : I have eating disorder tendencies and people keep saying I'm faking it. It makes me feel like I'm invalidating myself. Why is this?! How can I explain it without self-diagnosing? Second part: I hate eating anything and all (my therapist knows), but whenever someone is interested in my food or wants me to share it, I get really mad. I don't like it but I don't know why! It's so frustrating, could you provide some advice please?

  16. Hi Kati,
    Can you please mention how easy it is for people to take advantage of people with bipolar in cases where they are not with a therapist? Thank you.

  17. I was diagnosed with bipolar mania. The diagnosis was shared with me about 3 years ago, by my former therapist (former because she retired). I'm curious if bipolar 1 is the same as bipolar mania. Here's what I've experienced. I feel like there are 2 different mes; one that's the normal me, who really doesn't want to hurt anyone. And the other me; basically the opposite of me. I feel like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. My personality is more akin to Dr. Jekyl's, but there are times when Mr. Hyde crashes the party. I'm on meds (proscribed by my psychiatrist), and see a therapist, but crap still happens. That being said, I've also found that I can relate to others on a deeper level (I don't like small talk) in the fact that their worst days of their lives are a walk in the park for me. Would I wish this (having bipolar) on anyone? As Gabriel Iglesias puts it, "Oh hell no!" It comes with stigmas. But I will say that because I have bipolar, I've had to train myself to be very focused when doing stuff, like cooking a meal or tasks that I do at work. It's taken me years to be this focused. Actually, I think that I annoy some of the people I know with how focused I am. But I feel like it's my laser like focus that helps my out. It's when I get scatter brained that I know an episode is probably going to occur. I'll be 38 years old this December, and I believe I was diagnosed with bipolar in October of 1993 (right before I turned 12).

  18. Hi Katie! I was interested in becoming a therapist but l have no idea where to begin or what to specialize or where to go? There are so many complications I’d love it if l could get some guidance? I don’t have a ton of money to go to a private school for so many years for a degree

  19. I’m 16 and was diagnosed bipolar 1 about a month ago. The doctor I had before my new one misdiagnosed me with depression kind of like mentioned in the video.
    But for me, bipolar makes me feel out of control and frustrated due to that lack of control. When I fall into a depression, I have crying spells and sleep a little more then usual. I often feel like I will never be happy again. But then, within a week to a month.. I feel right back on track.. So motivated I feel like I can do anything. As the middle of the night approaches, I stay up till 8 in the morning thinking of all the amazing things I could be doing instead of sleeping. So I stay up all night getting things done and feeling so excited while my thoughts race miles ahead of my actions. Whether depressed or manic, I feel very irritable and often snap at people I care about. I later feel guilt and wish I had better control. Bipolar is a rollercoaster of dipping into depression and then eventually back up to mania. I’ve become use to it, knowing that as I am in a manic state, it wont last forever so I try to use it to my advantage and get as much done as humanly possible before I dip into depression again. Thats a bit of what bipolar is like for me

  20. Could you make a video about insomnia, depression and anxiety? All combined?
    Im currently having anxiety. I sleep during the day and stay awake all night until 7/8am every day. It's so stressfull and exhausting

  21. I don’t have bipolar 1, but bipolar 2. I get really annoyed and disappointed when I’m told I need to take medication to make me sleep when I’m having hypomania because a few hours feels enough. Lack of sleep impacts in my decision making/judgment/insight. I’m learning to participate in ‘safe’ behaviours when hypomanic eg I garden, clean all day/evening. I keep myself busy with exercise. I allow myself to make grand plans but have a ‘deal’ to wait 24 hours/1 week (whatever feels reasonable at the time) and ask for 2 other opinions about it. My grand plans are often to do with study, career, physical accomplishments etc. These aren’t always usual achievable things that I can do overnight because of the depressive states I end up in. If I have the urge to shop, I go to second hand/thrift shops. I’m spending less money that way and it takes longer to find things. I am learning to think before I speak and be prepared to repair anything that might be embarrassing or awkward. I often share too much info. The next step of that is to remind myself of the guilt and embarrassment this will cause when I come down. I think of how many hours I need to work to pay for frivolous things and consider if it’s really needed.
    The drop into depression is awful. I really resent having to take medication to calm the hypomania. I remind myself how important my relationships, work and financial situation is. It really sucks. It’s very scary and emotionally painful dropping down. I really have to focus on getting the basics done. Eat, sleep. Try to exercise/work/socialise and keep safe.

    I often feel like I’m destined to be depressed as this is considered safer than hypomania/mania. In some ways I agree eg personal safety from accidental injury is a risk. In other ways I disagree because I feel self harm is more of a risk when low. I just have to trust what health professionals say because I’m aware my insight is poor. When I’m ‘normal’ I’m astonished at how I live most of the time. It’s exhausting and constant. I had a really good medication regime going but am temporarily weaning off under supervision because of medical reasons. I can’t take antidepressants because they make me much worse. There are some antipsychotics available if I need. Right now I think I’m fumbling through ok with skills I’ve learnt/am learning with Dialectical Behaviour Therapy. I’ve done short courses in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. I need ALOT of help which is difficult to ask for as I’ve been so independent all my life before the deterioration and diagnosis a couple of years ago.

    I also need to manage a physical chronic health condition that needs 24/7 care that involves constant monitoring and self adjustments of medication. While I have monthly support in this, day to day I am in my own. I tend to have better management when I’m hypomanic than depressed which adds to my frustration and reluctance to report hypomanic behaviours.

  22. I am irritable all the time, was beat by my dad and picked on at school day in day out over and over. When I'm depressed I'm irritable, when I'm manic I'm irritable. Also paranoid of relationships ending. I hate myself. I also experience sudden inappropriate laughter, or crying.

  23. When I’m manic, I feel like I am on drugs. Imagine if you took a ton of adderall or way too much caffeine or cocaine. I have so much energy, I’m ready to drop everything and move to Greece like in Mama Mia.
    It feels like everything in my life is falling apart, and it’s all my fault because I’m the one who made the mess.
    When I’m depressed, I feel nothing. Just a void inside of me. Despair and loathing and hopelessness and anger.
    But most of all, bipolar 1 feels unfair.
    Unfair that I’m 20 and have to take 3 medications just to live a normal life.
    But the thing is, the medicine helps SO much, and I am living a pretty successful life. The most important thing with bipolar is identifying it, because then you can treat it. Bipolar is no reason not to live a fulfilling life.

  24. If we have all that symptoms but don’t have talkative feature what are we? Still consider as bi polar disorder?

  25. Hi Kati, I know you have a couple of videos about finding the right therapist, but I couldn't find an answer to my problem.

    I've been in therapy for a couple of years now and I've had many different therapists/psychiatrists, and now I'm at the point where I have to choose with whom to continue. Sometimes I like them a lot and I feel safe enough to tell them stuff (which is a big thing since I have PTSD), but I keep finding myself withholding things. Now there is one who can always see right through me. Therefore we get a lot deeper in less time, but I don't feel safe enough to tell her things myself. I always feel judged (which happens very quickly).

    Now I find it really hard to decide if I have to pick 'a safe one' or go through with the one who sees everything.
    It's a luxury problem, but can you please help?

  26. Thank you so much for this video. I have Bipolar and am not great at explaining how it makes me feel etc to my family. I’ve shared this with them this evening xx

  27. I have been diagnosed with Bipolar 1 with anxiety and severe depression when I’m having a episode I feel it coming on I get agitated and my mood completely change it feels like something going on inside my head an it’s hard to describe what’s going on

  28. I willing share my episode with bipolar 1. It feels like when you Manic you are felt much more self-confident than usual, you have a race ideas but there not always good when your good one it's feel very fun at times and enjoy blow but it usual stress out and never can get it to your goals because there not really goals that you can make happen there way too big solving trying big world problems a by yourself or how I can become pro in sports but when bad ideas can do thinking you wish never did in the the first place but in both there is very little sleep also no sleep and its can last for a few days or a lot days most like for me like 3 weeks so its such too at same. Depressed is very hard too. You can live with bipolar and live pretty normal life and a succeful person I in college at TU go owls! I also a serious and I got great grades so far and I also looking for work in sports at same time right now and still have time do things you love to do,for me its play sports,workout,listen to Music,going to concerts,seeing art and do art and getting college and hanging out my friends.even some people you look up to have bipolar.

  29. I shaved my hair off in a manic episode… I was very depressed on top of the mania and aggravated with my hair being knotted and my roots coming in.
    I was homeless at the time and I didn’t see any way to “fix my hair” so I just shaved it off. Then my boyfriends family reached out to me because they were worried. They offered a place for me to stay. And since I came down off my mania I regret doing it. I thought it was super rational and fun at the time though. 😂

  30. The not being able to get a word in edge wise is everyone I know. I rarely can get a word in edge wise.

  31. As someone recently diagnosed with Bipolar 1 disorder, this was a great video. I regret so many things I did in my manic episode, but now I'm on medication and I'm stable so things worked out

  32. I have bipolar 1, it was a rough ride for awhile. But i finally are on the right meds. And i work full-time at something i love and enjoy. I have a son and a wife. It really can get better and under control but it takes time and patients to get there. So anyone who is dealing with this just remember there a light at the end of the tunnel an keep your chin up.

  33. aldbwjrnrbalfjw i was just recently
    diagnosed with bipolar 1 and i’m so thankful you uploaded this ❤️

  34. Hey Katie, I like that you're hear to educate the community, but do you think that in the way it's put out here that if people feel like they can relate to what you're saying and if their parents are against them getting help from other adults because they feel attacked that it isn't always helpful in how much it seems you're on the our side? That might sound confusing but does it make sense? Is it just my viewpoint that makes your way of education g and advocating a bad thing at times?

  35. I request a video on Borderline Personality Disorder and the “ favorite person” how do you get over them if they don’t want to be with you?

  36. Katy can you make a video talking about bpd and bipolar disorder together? I was diagnosed with bpd and bipolar 1. Thank you🌼

  37. I have bipolar I with psychosis during episodes. It's a nightmare when it happens. During a manic episode, I will start a ton of projects and never follow through with them–Just got myself into that predicament. I've ended up in a different country thinking it was a great idea or have gone to a different state to party on a whim. If I am not doing things like that, I am extremely agitated and will snap at someone for asking me a question, especially one I have gone over before. During a depression episode, I won't get out of bed and I will call out of work. It feels like my energy has been completely drained and causes issue with my job and social life. I'll lose interest in everything and anything. It's like there's no life or passion and it is extremely frustrating because most of the time, there's no reason for it. It just is. During a mixed episode, it just gets bat-shit crazy. All my mood changes are always intense too, I can't even hide them. When I am in one of my episodes–and the part that gave me the psychosis diagnosis–I will start hearing things or seeing things that aren't there. Especially "shadow people" as it's been called. It's scary but sometimes I don't even realize it's happening and feels completely normal. I'll detach from the reality around me and everything seems dreamy. Colors become more vibrant, people could talk to me but it doesn't feel real, etc. I've been in the hospital enough times to where I know I'll never be able to just stop going to a doctor or medication. When I'm stable, you would have no idea that I'm bipolar. I accomplish a lot, finish projects, have more life in–but the healthy way–, and so forth. Luckily stability can last months before another episode happens.

    I know I will never be "okay" and normal. It sucks and it's embarrassing, but at least I am sticking to a routine and getting the help I need.

  38. I have bipolar 1. Just went off meds and am currently manic. Because of therapy the past three years like DBT, I am able to avoid impulsive decisions. Hopefully I can continue to manage it off meds.

  39. Hi Kati. I love your channel a whole lot. ♥️ You are really great, sensitive and kind. Most of all, you seem to know what you talk about 100%. I have a question. How is the best way to help someone who is in need of a therapist, a psychologist or at least a group? Many times, patients don't know there is a problem or refuse to seek help. Or they sought help before and couldn't or would not continue with therapy and don't want to "tell the whole tale again "… I have friends who really need help and I often run into walls whole trying to convince them to get the help they need. Embaressment, shame, fear or double binding can make it hard to try and get help or the trauma itself. Like, "we don't talk about this " mind sets of parents. Or "There are no problems " behaviour and faith sets or anything like that. This all may make it hard for someone to seek help or help them face their issues. Do you have any advice on that, Kati?

  40. I'm diagnosed with major depression along with generalized anxiety (mostly social and separation). My former psych questioned whether I had it or not, but didnt get an official answer cuz she dropped me cuz I wasn't I'm improving.
    I currently see a counselor at school which is a life saver. I've been seeing her less than a tear, but have made more progress in that time vs 4yrs. She questioned whether I was diagnosed as bipolar, but couldn't say for sure.
    I think I'm in a mania right now, but that could change in an instant

  41. I have a older brother with Bipolar I so lately I’ve been making sure I educate myself. I even did a capstone project which is my big project that is done in senior year of high school on bipolar disorder and depression awareness. I enjoy your videos and soon I’ll be in college and on my way to help others like you do. 😄💕

  42. I have bipolar 1 and my kids hate me because of the mistakes I've made. 😭 I have no idea how to explain what is going on with me. And why before my diagnosed I slept alot, yelling, not being faithful. But with my meds I'm a totally different person.

  43. My husband is diagnosed bipolar(I don't know if it's one or two) . I hate to say it but he drives me INSANE. I don't know how to handle his mood swings, he is usually angry but I mean a level I can't wrap my head around type. It's so hard because it feels like it falls on me to get him out of these cycles when he can't even do it himself(which I understand is what this disorder partly is) but at the same time managing his issues or staying out of his way or not pissing him off has pretty much taken over everything

  44. I Do have I thought ocd but I do overshop. I got 12 credit cards and maxed all them out in the tune of $8,000.00 For the space of two weeks. Then I was so depressed and exhausted after that. For about a week. Then I am a sex addict who can’t get enough. But my medicine makes me have panic attracts. What do you think.

  45. I have never done drugs before, but when I was manic I literally felt like I was on heroin. I felt like this rush throughout my body. Orgasmic. I swear I cannot explain it, but it was eye rolling; it was incredible yet scary because I didn’t know where it was coming from.

  46. my dad, who also emotionally abused me, who i don't see anymore because of his emotional abuse but he keeps taking my mom to court trying to see me also she physically abused me (but dosen't anymore and realizes her mistake so she is the parent i want to live with) has bipolar 1 disorder. it's good to know what he was going through since that is a disorder i don't have. also, is it true that many bipolar people don't understand they have a disorder so they often refuse medication?

  47. I have bipolar 1 and am stuck in a depression episode. Honestly at first I love being manic be cause I feel amazing and can get so much done but after I feel like my happiness was fake and I feel guilty. Which leads to my depression. I haven’t been manic in a few months and I miss it.

  48. I was diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia a few years back but ever since I started college I’ve been going through major depressive and manic episodes. So basically I have schizoaffective disorder. To me, mania is like driving a race car but not finding the brakes. I get extremely anxious and irritated while also being … well, manic? It’s so confusing at times

  49. I was told I have Bipolar 2 because I have Major Depression and usually I am hospitalised for SI. But I had severe mania (severe for me that's used to depressive episodes) but the Dr threw it to the side because I had slept more than 7 hours in the week. But I sleep about 3 hours a night with many interruptions. It's annoying to have my mania pushed aside because of my SI.

  50. My bipolar is getting a bad mainc and depression both most of the time i have it more cuzz i cant keep a realtionship

  51. Hardest part for me is mixed episodes – all of my suicide attempts have happened during those. I usually disassociate when I feel depressed, and I have the energy to do things and the lack of reason when I'm manic. So mixed episodes are the hardest because you could see how having an 'out of body experience', feeling deeply sad, feeling no consequences would be real, lacking impulse control and feeling suddenly motivated is the perfect combination for a suicide attempt. People with loved ones with BP 1, please look out for them during those times especially!

  52. My sister has bipolar 1 she drives everyone in the house crazy because of it an she has this boy friend that she has to have around her everyday or she makes everyone in the house miserable until she dose an everyone in the house is fed up because she loves him more than herself an the family we're just tired of it she doesn't want help herself how does she expect anyone to want to help her

  53. I’m struggling because I’ve been diagnosed as BP 1 but also BPD and then some say I have Neither. No offense but like why is the mental health field so damn inconsistent?! It’s like no one really knows what these illnesses are. 🙁

  54. How can you be contacted? I have bipolar 1 disorder and G.A.D. , at times my anxiety is overwhelming and very severe. and was told p.t.s.d. , also .,O.C.D. can you be my therapist by phone??

  55. Awww…thanks sooo much Kati !!! I think I've it as the stuffs u said match with mine. But my bf wants an explanation n I did tell him about it. The prob is my parents don't believe in this disorder n I've no means of meeting a psychiatrist. I talked to 3 counsellors in my university n I'm dissapointed n embarrassed by all of them. Idk what else to do or how to cope with THIS.
    Pls help me !!!!

  56. I have dealt with the onset of schizoaffective disorder. This happened after being diagnosed with bipolar 1 for three years. This has helped me so much!

  57. i'm really tired of it. i never feel "okay", not for more than a couple hours. I've been on several mood stabilizers as well as antidepressants and antipsychotic for a few years now. i know that these meds have also contributed to my anguish. i really feel like i'm about 30 years older than i am. I've had to leave my profession. i literally have no idea what to do, short of a round of ECT

  58. Also do you lose yourself in this illness? Have not been medicated for 2 years and I can't function at all. I don't even remember what kind of person I am anymore.

  59. It’s like a roller coaster for me. I hate it.

    My mum is trying to prove to me why my disorder is fake

  60. It feels like a crappy wooden roller coaster, particularly when I’m rapid cycling. I’m BP1 with borderline tendencies. My head is a constant battle of my own thoughts. I’m on medication but I have it pretty severely, and I have to actively work on it and myself every day. I have to practice mindfulness constantly. Some days I’ll even just describe to myself what I’m doing in my head so I don’t think about bad things. Right now I’m rapid cycling, I’m having irritability and racing thoughts as well as depressive symptoms. But when I’m level, I’m pretty happy and sometimes I’m even thankful for bp1 because idk if I’d be the creative person I am – I am who I am and bp1 is part of that. But it’s a very tough disability and I struggle a lot. I’m lucky I have such a wonderful, loving support system. Mania is pretty lit lol if I could choose, I would choose to be manic BUT I make SUCH dangerous choices when I’m manic

  61. When low, feels like no hope in living, in humanity. All i think is died is a wonderful thing could happen to someone because all nonsense of living is gone. When feel high i feel so much better, more focus. Can finish multiples task at same time. Feel more productive. But when mix is crazy, i feel hate when someone talking, then minutes later i want they talking. But when i feel high feeling i have thought to control it because i know when i feel down i will regrets my actions i do when i feel high. Its so annoying when people use your word against you

  62. I was diagnosed last year with BP1 and looking back on it, I've had it for years. I've been on a destructive path for years. The final straw was last year when during a manic episode, I maxed all my credit cards, and took out 2 bank loans just so I could spend it on God knows what – I have nothing to show for it. Then came the aggression. I am a pretty relaxed, docile, 68kg man generally. I participate in jiu-jitsu for fitness and I actually attacked a men and nearly choked him unconscious for stepping in front of my car. That's when I realized something was wrong. That was so far out of character, the whole experience was like an out of body experience.

  63. Mania feels like LITERALLY the inability to get myself exposed to anything slightly far from CERTAIN excitement for even one second. I just can't NOT be excited. I have to do whatever would keep my world moving as fast as possible. I don't care what it is that I do, and I don't care why it's happening, I just have to keep it moving. And the only way to keep it moving is to GRAB whatever I want, and I do want so much things that it is too exciting to be REALIZED and controlled. So then I dive into it, and believe that this is life, I completely stop thinking about how a 'bit weird' it is. I feel like everything is about me and only me, and everything is moving for me and trying to serve my purposes, somehow.

  64. Is it all relative to the person's usual self? I'm usually quiet/very socially anxious, but when I'm 'up' Im talkative and confident. However this might not be recognisable by a doctor as Im not talking a mile a minute. But for me it is very extreme from how I usually am. Also can you please explain more about mixed episodes and also the difference between irritablility in mania and depression Vs borderline personality disorder? It's almost as if my BPD is episodic.. thankyou 🙌

  65. When I'm manic I feel uncomfortable and uncomfortable. I usually know when I'm manic. When I'm depressed I don't leave my room for days😥

  66. Having bipolar 1 is like big waves sometimes you get the good of the ride and then sometimes you get the bad one thing I’ve always wanted to know was what is feels like not to have mental illness cause I see all my friends happy and I just can’t seem to be happy but other times I’m just so hyper I can’t control it

  67. I was diagnosed with Bipolar 1 disorder. I am looking for friends and support from people who struggle with the same thing. I also look to be a friend and a support to others who suffer as well

  68. Bipolar 1 feels really really good, I don't have to sleep at all. Like great thoughts, ideas surges and I crash afterwards spiraling down to depression until I go to contemplating suicide again feeling worthless and all. So hard 😭😥😩😭

  69. This sounds like my ex she has these symptoms but she also has voices talking to her . After five years of management two years of that was hard on me and my daughter in the end she left and broke our family I hate this shit it cost me I never want to be around these types of people I have been very supportive during this time but she was in denial in the end like it never happened well fuk you bipolar.

  70. Some days I feel like I'm on the top of the world, making all of the right choices, relating with people and making them laugh. Other days, I feel like I'm worthy of nothing, completely robotic, withdrawn, uncomfortable in my skin, guilty. Then there are other days when I feel calm, content, analytical, comfortable. No matter how I'm feeling, though, it's always to the extreme.

    My moods generally stay stable during the day and switch at night. I've found that how I feel is largely determined by the choices I make during the day; like my diet and activity choices.

  71. It's like driving a car when you can't control the speed. It either wants to go 350 mph or 2. The street you're driving on is an obstacle course. The windshield is sometimes on fire. You can't get out of the car, stop driving, or find a new car, because the car is your brain, and you're stuck. The only way to get through the circus shitshow is with therapy, medication, and some herculean determination.

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